Fears about blogging

While I have never minded telling the people who I love or know really well about my illness, I have always worried about what other people may think of me if they found out. Some parts of my illness I have felt quite ashaimed of and I know that there are lots of people out there who are very quick to judge those who suffer from eating disorders.

For years I was too frightened to start a blog as I didnt want anyone who knew me to find it and judge me. I was also worried about what complete strangers would think of me if I shared this incredibely personal and awful battle I have had with them. Eventually I realised that I had nothing to be ashaimed of and didnt realy care about whether someone I know reads my blog or not.

The reason why all of these worries have dissappeared since starting to blog is because I can see all the positives that have come out of my blogging. I have achieved so much more in terms of my recovery then I have ever been able to before as I feel 100% more motivated to recover. Who cares what people think of me if blogging helps me to recover. I would much rather be recovered one day then to remain ill for the rest of my life because I was scared about what others may think.

I remember being too scared to even write a comment on anybody elses recovery posts before I started blogging myself because I didnt want anyone to even see my name, incase someone knew who I was. Now however I dont even think twise about writing incredibly personal posts on my own blog. I have pictures of me and my name written all over my blog and dont really care who finds it as I am proud of my blog and what it stands for.



Also, having the opportunity to make a positive contribution to the online recovery community means so much to me. Even if 10 people read my blog and made fun of it, as long as I knew I was still helping atleast 1 person, I would keep blogging. I want to be able to help people suffering from eating disorders so much and at the moment, I feel as though writing  my blog is the best way I can do this. Nothing means more to me then when peple comment on my posts and tell that they have found my advice helpful or inspiring.

I know I am not recovered yet but for the first time in my life, I feel as though I will be one day. Thanks to everyone who reads or comments on my blog as you all help to give me the inspiration I need to continue on my recovery journey each day. Also, thanks to the other writers out there for your own recovery blogs and posts. I am so proud to be a part of our special little online recovery community and would reccommend it to anyone trying to overcome an eating disorder.