Miss independent

Due to the strained relationship my mum and I have had over the years, I have grown up to be a lot more independent then my siblings which I am really happy about. I absolutely love doing things for myself and being independent, as it allows me to feel more proud of my achievements. This also means that I dont ever feel as though I owe anyone anything, as everything good in my life I have worked really hard for myself, I havent just had it handed to me by someone else.

A big part of being independent for me is being financially independent. When I went to live in Hobart so that I could go to university, I paid for everything myself. I bought my own text books, paid my rent and bought my own food. I bought both my first and second car and have paid for all of my medication, food, toiletries, phone bill and clothes for as long as I can remember.

Although I sometimes feel a bit upset that my parents (mainly my mum) have helped me out less financially then my brothers, this also makes me appreciate everything I own, as I have bought it myself with money I have worked hard for. In fact, if my parents ever offered to give me money, I would not accept it as I would rather just financially support myself.

My mum always expected more of me then my brothers. For example I was expected to do things like make my bed, while they never have been. I have also always been expected to buy my own clothes if I ever needed them, while my mum still buys colthes for my brothers now, even though they are both adults.Both of my brothers still bring their dirty clothes home to her every weekend which she washes, dries and irons for them and they still dont clean up after themselves, as mum has always just done it for them.

While I have been relatively independent for years, I have only become completely independent since moving out of home and I have absolutely thrived since then. I love doing everything for myself and knowing that I dont rely on anyone else for anything. Even tbough moving out was expensive and I do struggle financially sometimes, I am still managing relatively well and feel proud of the fact thatI am making it on my own.

I love being so independent and I honestly would never have it any other way. Something I do need to get better at is asking for help when I do need it, as I know that there is nothing wrong with doing that either. I need to try and remember that asking for help when you need it does not make you weak, it just makes you sensible.

One day I plan to raise my children exactly the same way as I have been raised. I want them to learn to be independet from a young age, so that they can look after themselves better when they get older and do not rely on others to do everything for them, all the time. I think that this type of independence also teaches a person a good sence of responsibility, which is also very important in life.

I think that being a strong and idependent person has helped me a lot in my recovery so far. An important thing to remember about recovery is that no one can make you recover, unfortunatly you need to do all of the hard work yourself. Since I am so used to doing everything myself anyway, I have taken on the responsibility of getting better, once I decided that I wanted too, really well.