In this post I talk about my weight and BMI and there are also some photos of me when I was very underweight as well as when I am heealthy.
After getting up and weighing myself this morning, I was quite happy to see that my weight is still exactly the same as it was over a week a go when I weighed myself last. My weight has been stable for around a month now and my body seems to be able to run healthily and happily at this weight. I am feeling really quite comfortable with the way my body currently looks which is an amazing feeling as I cant rememebr the last time I was actually happy with my body.
I am currrently eating a minimum daily intake of 2500 calories and I really do feel fantastic. I no longer experience any of the symptoms that I once experienced whilst restricting or undereating. The most noticeable difference to me is not actually with my physical health but instead with my mental health. I find that I can now think so clearly and my anxiety levels are also much lower then they have been for years.
Some professionals may argue that I have not gained enough weight as my bmi is still only 19, which is at the very bottom of the healthy weight range.
I have spoken to my GP about this and she is quite happy for me to remain at my current weight. The goal weight she initially set for me was 50 kg and she was thrilled that I has chosen to gain even more weight myself. My doctor knows how thin my parents and my siblings are and also knows what my figure was like before I developed anorexia and she seems to think that my current weight is a healthy weight for me.
Sometimes I feel as though I should keep gaining some more weight but only so that I can be a good role model for my readers, not for any other reason. I like my body the way it currently is and I worry that if I gain too much more weight I will become unhappy with the way I look again which will lead to bad body image for me as well as a possible relapse. Also, if I was not feeling so healthy and happy then I would be more inclined to gain some more weight, however I am feeling so fantastic, it feels quite unneccesary.
The main reason I don't want to 'stop half way' is beecause I know that making a full recovery is impossible if I faill to reach my natural healthy body weight. If a time ever comes that I feel as though I am still anorexic and unable to make any more progress, then this is when I will start trying to gain more weight again. For now however I can still feel myself making recovery progress and getting healthier and stronger each day so I am just going to continue letting my body maintain, as it currently is.
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| July 2013 |
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| July 2015 |
Something that I simply cant stress enough is that you need to listen to the doctors and health care professions who are looking after YOU. Just because my doctor says that it is ok for me to stop gaining weight at the weight I am currenttly at does not mean it is necessarily healthy for you to stop at a bmi of 19 too. We just need to do what is the best thing for OURSELVES and concentrate on getting healthy and making a full recovery. Keep fighting everyone, we can do this <3 xx
