Sunday 4 October 2015

Good body image day

Ever since I was a little girl, I believed that it was wrong to like how you look. I believed that if someone said something they liked about themselves, they were arrogant. Therefore every time I ever thought aything nice about myself, I would get angry at myself and think I was doing the wrong thing. I suppose that this is why I eventually hated myself and how I looked so much.

I know that I often write on here about having bad body image days, but I never talk about feeling comfortable with my body even though that happenss sometimes. I guess the reson why I don't usualy talk about it is because a part of me still believes that it is wrong to like yourself or think something good about yourself. But I am now learning that this is not the case at all.

I woke up this morning feeling positive and confident and as I put on a short pair of black shorts, I wasn't really bothered at all. As I was walking through town,  I caught a glimpse of my reflection in one of the shop windows but instead of feeling fat or unhappy with how I looked like I usually do, I felt fine about my reflection. Not overjoyed or excited, but still good.
Yes my legs looked much bigger then they once did but I din't instantly see this as a bad thing or feel self conscious as I usually would have. Instead I thought about how strong and toned they looked, which I think must be due to all the walking I have been doing. 

When I got back home, I tried on a new pair of work pants that I have recieved from the bendigo bank, not knowing if they would fit me or not and I was delighted when they fit me perfectly. I felt happy that I could order adults clothes (even if in the smallest size) and have them fit me perfectly!

I wanted to write this post today to show you all that there really isn't anything wrong with accepting yourself and thinking good things about the way you look. In fact, I encourage you to try and think good things about yourself more often nas accepting yourself really is an important part of the recovery process. 

Just because I didn't hate my reflection when I saw it this morning does not mean that I am self obsessed or egotistic as I once would have thought. It just means that I have been able to find peach with who I am and how I look, which is exactly what it should be like.

And finally, I wanted to write this post to let you all know that it is possible to accept the way you look after having an eating disorder. When I was underweight, I never thought for even a second that I would ever be able to accept my body at a normal weight, but now I do. In fact, I like my body more now then I did when I was underweight! :)




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