Tuesday 21 April 2015

A bad day at work

Yesterday, I had a really bad day at work. As I am still only in training at the bank, I usually spend a bit of time working on the counter and also a bit of time doing some online training courses. Yesterday I spent the whole day doing the online training courses as that is what the other lady I work with wanted me to do. Although I would prefer to do a bit of work on the counter as well, it didn't bother me that much as it meant I could get lots of my training out of the way,

What did bother me was the way the other lady spoke to me all day. She was bossy, inpatient and at times nasty. I couldn't explain why she was acting like this but it felt very personal, like she was mad at me for some reason. Especially since she was being really friendly and polite to the other staff member that was there.  I know that she could have personal stuff going on at home but I don't think that gives her any right to take it out on me.

By the end of the day I was too frightened to speak as I felt as though she would instantly jump down my throat and each time she snapped at me I felt really upset. At one moment I even had to hold back tears. Yesterday was the first day since starting my new job at the bank that I left feeling really down and flat. I really hope that things are better today, otherwise I may need to consider talking to my boss, as I don't think I could handle being treated that way, every single day I work. Today is a new day so I know that I need to forget about yesterday and turn up to work with a positive attitude that today WILL be better.

Lots of people wouldn't let what others say bother them but unfortunately I take things to heart very easily. I am a very sensitive person and when people treat me badly, I start feeling as though they are right and that I deserve it. I guess it is all to do with the lack of self respect and confidence that I have always had for myself which is also related to my anorexia. As I recover I want to learn to love myself for who I am and I know that this will require me to stop letting others bring me down and make me feel bad about myself. I wish I wasn't as sensitive to what others say but I also can't help the way I feel.

Does anybody have any advice about how to ignore hurtful comments instead of taking them to heart?



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